Whenever i set myself to do something, i have a “honeymoon” phase with the idea or subject i’m approaching, followed by long strides of feeling demotivated and having a hard time going on with a project.
It’s a battle that i decided to lose for most of my youth and the first chunk of adult life.
The first time i felt truly committed to something was when i got my CCNA R&S.
I’m now tackling CCNA Security. I’m doing it as a stepping stone for CCNP. I got my CCNA in 2012 and in the mean time i focused on Work, getting better at what i do and learning as much as possible “in the field”.
Taking a look at the blueprint, the year i got left of CCNA would not be enough to properly prepare for one of the CCNP exams. Rather than risking it, i decided to go for a “Tier 1.5″ certification, and CCNA Security fits the bill nicely.
Now the time is right to get back to actual studying.
I already failed the test once, i went unprepared because i was in a hurry. I came 30 points short of the objective.
I tanked two subjects and did so-so on others. I still feel grossly unprepared.
Main issues i meet while trying to study are:
- Work is often draining, long hours and important issues that needs to be thought through. It does not leave much mental energy to study.
- Personal life is already paper thin and it suffers from studying. Family sees studying as a concession that’s been made to me.
- My attention span is extremely short. I think i have an above average natural focus, but it comes in short bursts and i need to be alone. Also, i never trained it. I have never been a hard worker, but i’ve been trying to fix that these past few years.
One perspective-changing realization i had since i got CCNA though, is that working hard *really* gets you to where you want, or close enough that you will not live in regret.
To me, this means that by stubborness and constant failure, i eventually get where i want. It already happened and each time just strenghtens my resolve that bit more. There is no natural gift (although liking the work helps), there is no trick to it. Just crushing into the wall over and over again until it crumbles and you can go further down the road to the next one.
I only have this weekend and the next to study for the exam. I’m ready to postpone it if necessary but i’d really like being done with this.